Baker Mansion (Resident Evil 7)
It may be a bit of a cheat, considering that this game isn’t going to be out for another couple of months. But based on what we know of this house, it’s safe to say that anyone who decides to trick or treat here will probably not be leaving with their candy. Or their limbs in general.
The plantation mansion in which Resident Evil 7 is set is home to the Baker family, said to be a very creepy group of people. More recently, we met three of them, none of whom appeared to be nice, probably because they’re cannibals. (And also because they straight up smell bad.) If you’re the kind of person who can turn a blind eye to cannibalism, that’s totally fine… as long as you ignore the part where they also appear to be virtually unkillable, since one of them can survive an exploding car. Plus, the game is set in Louisiana, so even if you did manage to escape all that crazy, there’s a possibility that you’d wind up getting eaten by gators.
Rapture (Bioshock Games)
Perhaps you think that deciding to trick or treat on land is boring, so you want to go to a different environment, like say, underwater. After all, those BioShock games made it look cool, right? Even though Rapture is full of the richest and smartest people Andrew Ryan knew back then, they had to have celebrated Halloween just for kicks, right? Yeah, so about that.
All those stuffy elites and aristocrats probably did celebrate the colorful holiday at some point, but then Adam and classism took over, turning Rapture into an amusement park gone wrong. There’s only two types of survivors here, and neither have much in the way of candy. The Splicers, enhanced with Plasmids and leaving them with a constant addiction to the Adam that gives them their abilities, will at least wear masks to celebrate the occasion, but they’ll also try to rip your face off. And then there are the Little Sisters, who… let’s just say their dads encourage staying away from them at all costs. The worst part of all that is just how wet everything is. You’ll ruin your shoes in just an hour of trick or treating, and that’s to say nothing of the awful decor.
The Sprawl (Dead Space 2)
The Sprawl is a better home to live in compared to the USG Ishimura of the original Dead Space, no doubt about that. Unlike the “planetcracker” starship of the original game, the Sprawl served as a home for dozens, if not hundreds of lives, complete with a school for the kids. And for a while, you could trick or treat there in peace. People would actually give you candy.
Unfortunately, it didn’t take terribly long for the place to become infested with Necromorphs and for bodies to start dropping, before mutating and shambling around. It’s hard to want to put on a costume and go from door to door asking for candy when your former neighbor is hiding in the vents waiting to tear your arm off and turn your head into a blood fountain. The dark lights and dead silence help set the atmosphere, for sure, but there has to be a way to do that without there also being a horde of zombie children running for your legs. Don’t let them get your candy!
Dracula’s Castle (Castlevania)
Castles are already bad houses to live in, and Dracula’s Castle in particular is probably the worst one to live in. It’s freakishly big, it’s home to about 80 different types of mythological creatures, and there’s bats everywhere. Unless you’re big into gothic horror or want to play hide and seek and make it as complicated as possible, this isn’t the place for you to live, let alone trick or treat.
One has to imagine that Halloween is when the mythological creatures mainly come out to do their thing, as games such as Symphony of the Night have shown us. Werewolves, gorgons, mummies, Frankenstein’s monster, and more all just hanging around the castle. If the previous entries in the series are anything to go off of, none of them are likely to give you any candy if you ask them for some, and Dracula himself is probably going to just turn you into chow, which is technically a treat for someone.
Spencer Mansion (Resident Evil)
Not completely unlike the Baker Mansion, the Spencer Mansion is a place you should only trick or treat at if you’re incredibly desperate for candy. Just hearing about it already sets off about five alarm bells: there’s a crashed helicopter nearby, the only evidence of the people who were inside the helicopter is a severed hand, and dogs attack and kill one of your team members.
Unfortunately, you’re forced to take refuge inside the house itself once the dogs realize there’s more than one person to snack on. As if the creep factor didn’t make the place bad enough, there’s also a traitor within Alpha Team. (It’s Wesker. Seriously, just listen to his name, “Albert Wesker,” and tell me that doesn’t sound like the name of a double agent). Oh, and don’t forget about that big bastard, the Tyrant. He won’t give you candy, but he will give you a fist to the face instead. Don’t think it’s all over once you leave the mansion. As future games in this world have shown us, Halloween just doesn’t end for some people.
About the author
